10: You’re talking about seeing the Crown and you’re nowhere near Buckingham Palace!
9: You know a fetoscope does not measure shoe size!
8: Broken water never involves busted pipes in your world!
7: You can get out of a speeding ticket by showing the policeman the placenta.
6: Black Birkenstocks are the most formal footwear you own.
5. You can eat cherry jello while watching a birthing movie!
4: You’ve used a speculum to put on a tight pair of shoes.
3: You know the only appropriate use for forceps is as salad tongs!
2: You’ve had your picture taken with so many babies you should run for office!
and the number one way to tell you’re a nurse midwife:
1: You call getting out of beeper range your vacation!
Happy Labor Day to all the Nurse Midwives out there!