Posts Tagged 'nurse jokes'
10. If it’s wet, make it dry.
9. If it’s dry, make it wet.
8. Always ask for on-call pay before agreeing to overtime.
7. Never tell management what you are really thinking.
6. Never finish report with, “You have an easy assignment”.
5. Never say, “This looks like a easy assignment”.
4. Don’t expect anyone to do their job – especially when you really need them to.
3. Don’t expect doctors to believe anything you tell them.
2. If you don’t have enough time to do everything, take 30 minutes to complain about it and then make it all happen.
1. If it moves, rattles, shakes, falls down, or won’t stay in place: tape it.
Wife speaking to marriage counselor: “And now I’ll explain my husband’s side of the story!”
My patient was a fragile eighty year old man. He needed to ride to the shower in our special chair, which ahd a hole in the bottom for water to drain. I loaded him up, using good body mechanics. I covered him with warm blankets, wrapped his feet, and took all the shower things we needed for a single trip down the hall.
I was feeling quite proud of myself. Then my instructor stopped me and pulled me back a few steps. Pointing to my patient, she said, “What’s wrong with this picture?”
I was confused. What could possibly be the problem? Blankets? Check. Shower supplies? Check. Feet covered. Check. Uh-oh…What was that dangling out from the shower chair hole? Come to think of it, he had mentioned feeling a draft…