The nurse went in to check her patient in the ICU who was wearing nasal prongs. The nurse tried to talk to him, but all she could get out of him was gasping and unintelligible talk. Finally, the nurse thrust a note pad and pencil at the patient and said, “I can’t understand you, sir. Please write it down.”
The patient weakly scribbled on teh pad, “Get your dang foot off my oxygen tube!”
Classic JNJ humor by Jeanne Mueller, RN
Do you have a funny nursing story you’d like to share with the JNJ audience? Send it to us!
One day, after a man had his annual physical, the doctor came out and said, “You had a great checkup. Is there anything that you’d like to ask me?”
“Well,” he said, “I was thinking about getting a vasectomy.”
“That’s a pretty big decision. Have you talked it over with your family?”
“Yeah, and they’re in favor 15 to 2.”
Submitted by numerous people, but we must give credit to Bob M.
Dear Nurse Marge,
My NM has been reading your magazine, and now she’s trying to incorporate humor into everything she does.
Thanks a lot!
This woman is absolutely, positively not funny. She’s trying, so hard that it makes it even worse. She tells jokes badly, she keeps forwarding ‘funny’ emails, and if I see one more cartoon posted in the nurses station I’m going to scream.
How do I get her to stop – without hurting her feelings or jeopardizing my job? Is there a way to make her funny?
Dear Not Laughing,
Who dumped the bedpan in your corn flakes? You’ve got a NM who’s trying to lighten the mood and make your life better and you’re complaining?
Tell you what. You come work here, in my spot, with a NM who thinks just because she’s got a fancy-pants degree and all kinds of education she knows something about nursing, and an administrator who thinks it’s funny to ‘award’ us with doubles right before the holidays…
Hold on. I was getting a little steamed up there.
Your NM isn’t funny enough? Show her how it’s done. She tells a stinky joke? Tell a better one. She’ll be thrilled; she’s trying to get you all a little happier, you know. The cartoons are terrible? Find better ones. Tap into your slapstick side. Do some interpretive dance down the hallway. Wear a clown nose. Channel your inner Patch Adams and clown around, for goodness sake’s!
Then your NM won’t try so hard to make you laugh. You’ll be doing it for her.
P.S. It is true that some people just aren’t naturally very funny. But looks aren’t everything.