Doctor Translation Guide

“Welllllll, what have we here…”
Since he hasn’t the foggiest notion of what it is, the Doctor is hoping you or the patient will give him a clue.

“Let’s see how it develops.”
Maybe in a few days it will grow into something that can be cured.

“How are we today?”
I feel great. You, on the other hand, look like hell.

“I’d like to prescribe a new drug.”
I’m writing a paper and would like to use you for a guinea pig. You’ll be famous in the literature!

“If it doesn’t clear up in a week, give me a call.”
I don’t know what the hell it is. Maybe it will go away by itself.

“That’s quite a nasty looking wound.”
I think I’m going to throw up.

“This may smart a little.”
Last week two patients bit through their tongues. You’ll note I’ve positioned myself strategically out of reach.

“Well, we’re not feeling so well today, are we?”
I can’t remember your name, nor why you are here.

“If those symptoms persist, call for an appointment.”
I’ve never heard of anything so disgusting. Thank God I’m off next week.

“There is a lot of that going around.”
My God, that’s the third one this week. I’d better learn something about this.