Journal of Nursing Jocularity

Journal of Nursing Jocularity

Nurse’s Laugh: Relationship Jokes

As nurses, sometimes we hear WAY too much about our patient’s love lives. But this story made me grin:

A sixteen year-old boy came home with a new Chevrolet Avalanche and his parents began to yell and scream, “Where did you get that truck???!!!”

He calmly told them, “I bought it today.”

“With what money?” demanded his parents. They knew what a Chevrolet Avalanche cost.

“Well,” said the boy, “this one cost me just fifteen dollars.” So the parents began to yell even louder. “Who would sell a truck like that for fifteen dollars?” they said.

“It was the lady up the street,” said the boy. I don”t know her name – they just moved in. She saw me ride past on my bike and asked me if I wanted to buy a Chevrolet Avalanche for fifteen dollars.”

“Oh my Goodness!,” moaned the mother, “she must be a child abuser. Who knows what she will do next? John, you go right up there and see what”s going on.”

So the boy”s father walked up the street to the house where the lady lived and found her out in the yard calmly planting petunias. He introduced himself as the father of the boy to whom she had sold a new Chevrolet Avalanche for fifteen dollars and demanded to know why she did it.

“Well,” she said, “this morning I got a phone call from my husband. I thought he was on a business trip, but learned from a friend he had run off to Hawaii with his mistress and really doesn’t intend to come back to me. He claimed he was stranded and needed cash, and asked me to sell his new Chevrolet Avalanche and send him the money. So I did.”

Posted in: Enjoying Humor

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That Reminds Me…How Nurses Can Use Humor to Establish Relationship

Being a nurse is not unlike being an air traffic controller: there are dozens of things to keep track of at any given moment. Each patient we encounter is a new adventure. Just like a flight taking off, we may know where we think things are going — the patient who comes in with a blood sugar over 1000, potassium levels through the roof and only a tenuous grasp on consciousness likely isn’t headed for Labor & Delivery, after all. But, as every air traffic controller knows, the destination the plane reaches doesn’t necessarily match the one listed on the ticket.

Our patients have a disconcerting tendency to not perform as expected, to withhold critical information, and to come accompanied by a bevy of friends and relatives all determined to help and support them as they get better — while doing everything possible to prevent us from making that recovery possible. (more…)

Posted in: Columns

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March is National MS Awareness Month

March is National MS Education and Awareness Month. I was searching for some light-hearted content to share, and found the GotMS? Humor Page – there’s some great introductory information on humor and health management, as well as some jokes.

I like this one, although it’s got way more to do with IT than MS!

True story from the WordPerfect Helpline!

This is a true story from the WordPerfect helpline. Needless, to say the helpdesk employee was fired: however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for “Termination without Cause.”

Actual dialog of a former WordPerfect Customer Support

Employee: “Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, well, I’m having trouble with WordPerfect.”

Employee: “What sort of trouble?”

Customer: “Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.”

Employee: “Went away?”

Customer: “They disappeared.”

Employee: “Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?”

Customer: “Nothing.”

Employee: “Nothing?”

Customer: “It’s blank; it won’t accept anything when I type.”

Employee: “Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?”

Customer: “How do I tell?”

Employee: “Can you see the c:prompt on the screen?”

Customer: “What’s a sea-prompt?”

Employee: “Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?”

Customer: “There isn’t any cursor: I told you, it won’t accept anything I type.”

Employee: “Does your monitor have a power indicator?”

Customer: “What’s a monitor?”

Employee: “It’s the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it’s on?”

Customer: “I don’t know.”

Employee: “Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?”

Customer: “Yes, I think so.”

Employee: “Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it’s plugged into the wall.”

Customer: “Yes, it is.”

Employee: “When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?”

Customer: “No.”

Employee: “Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.”

Customer: “Okay, here it is.”

Employee: “Follow it for me, and tell me if it’s plugged securely into the back of your computer.”

Customer: “I can’t reach.”

Employee: “Uh huh. Well can you see if it is?”

Customer: “No”

Employee: “Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?”

Customer: “Oh, it’s not because I don’t have the right angle-it’s because it’s dark.”

Employee: “Dark?”

Customer: “Yes, the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.”

Employee: “Well, turn on the office light then.”

Customer: “I can’t.”

Employee: “No? Why not?”

Customer: “Because there’s a power outage.”

Employee: “A power….A power outage? Aha! Okay, we’ve got it licked now. Do you still have the box and manuals and packing stuff you computer came in?”

Customer: “Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.”

Employee: “Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.”

Customer: “Really? Is it that bad?”

Employee: “Yes, I’m afraid it is.”

Customer: “Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?”

Employee: “Tell them you’re too stupid to own a computer!”

(Have a great MS humor resource? Let us know! We’ll share it with the world!)

Posted in: Enjoying Humor

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