Star Charts by Suzanne LaBarne

Horoscopes Just For Nurses!

Cancer

Organizing Geri chair races is one thing — but attracting corporate sponsorship and a visit from NASCAR officials who want to check out the high-speed adventure?  That’s sheer brilliance!  Don’t be afraid to dream big Cancer — according to your stars, you should have five free minutes in 2018 to start making them come true.

Leo

Your patient is exhibiting signs of confusion, Leo.  From the string of orders they’ve issued, they think you’re their maid, travel agent, laundress and personal psychic!  Clear communication might help reorient the patient — but the prognosis doesn’t look good!

Virgo

Anxiety opens the week.  Never underestimate the power of one inappropriate admit to disrupt your equilibrium.  Let go of your need for perfection: sometimes other people have to learn from their mistakes.

Libra

Stretching — whether it’s physically, mentally, or metaphorically — dominates your stars this week, Libra.  Be careful:  nothing on the top shelf is really that important. While physical stretching carries an element of danger with it, your willingness to go the extra mile emotionally really changes lives this week.

Scorpio

Fighting the good fight takes lots of energy.  Normally passionate Scorpio feels drained.  You won’t need an adrenaline shot, though: your patients are determined to provide lots of heart-pumping excitement.  Which is great, unless you work in the cardiac unit, where it’s just Tuesday.

Sagittarius

Thou shalt not give the patient’s family the doctor’s home phone number.  Thou shalt not give the patient’s family the doctor’s home phone number.  Thou shalt not give the patient’s family the doctor’s home phone number.  (Keep repeating this until you believe it!)

Capricorn

Congratulations, Capricorn!  This week, you have the honor of caring for the world’s greatest medical genius!  Mind you, they don’t have any training, have never been to medical school…but they’ve seen every episode of ER TWICE!

Aquarius

It’s a fiery week for you, Aquarius!  Perhaps you’ll be dealing with a hot-headed surgeon or a rash of inflammations. Either way, your cool-headed approach saves the day!

Pisces

Sensitive Pisces struggles this week as tempers fly high.  Sidestepping conflict means extra work — is the peace of mind worth it?

Aries

Blow on a dandelion, sending wishes out into the whistling wind, Aries — for in this almost magical week, your most fanciful thoughts can prove fruitful.  Find yourself shy a stray breeze? Just redirect the O2 — it’ll work just as well!

Taurus

The most difficult thing in the world to resist is the temptation to tell the truth. Honest-to-a-fault Taurus finds themselves particularly tested this week, especially when confronted with patient families.  Hold on: communication difficulties will resolve themselves mid-week.

Gemini

You may suspect a developing blackberry allergy, Gemini.  It’s not the prickly black fruit that’s giving you hives — it’s the sight of one more patient that tells you to ‘hang on a minute’ while they finish a call!

Star Charts by Suzanne LaBarne are for entertainment purposes only.